


one wedding, one fiasco, and ann has seen too many romcoms

by Muir_Wolf



Series: trope_bingo [4]
Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Community: trope_bingo, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-13
Updated: 2013-01-13
Packaged: 2017-11-25 08:03:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/636812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Muir_Wolf/pseuds/Muir_Wolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Later, she’ll say she wasn’t thinking at all when she hurries up and half-slips, half-forces her arm through Ron’s.</p>
            </blockquote>





	one wedding, one fiasco, and ann has seen too many romcoms

“Ann,” Leslie says. “Ann, Tammy Two is here, she crashed the wedding and she’s here and I won’t let her ruin my day, Ann _I won’t let her ruin my day,_ Ron is giving me away and he can’t do that if Tammy voodoos him, Ann. Ann. Ann we have to stop her, Ann.”

“Okay, first of all you need to breathe,” Ann says. She can’t quite help smiling at Leslie. Leslie in her wedding dress, who’s been glowing this whole week to the extent that Ann doesn’t even need to turn on lights anymore. “You look gorgeous,” she says. She’s been saying it, but the words just keep slipping out of her mouth. Leslie just looks so _happy_ , even worried about Ron. “Secondly, I’ve got this.”

“You’ve got what? Ann, what are you going to do? Tammy Two is—”

“I’m a nurse,” Ann says. “You think a librarian’s got anything on me?” Leslie grins, quick and blinding, and practically throws her arms around Ann. Ann keeps her feet—barely—and squeezes her back.

“Ann, Ann you’re too good, you lady Steve Rogers.”

Ann holds her for another long moment— _only another hour and Leslie’s going to be married_ —and then releases her and steps back. “I’ll see you before you go out,” she says. “But don’t worry about Tammy. I’ll take care of it.” 

 

 

  
She doesn’t really have a plan, but given all the times Leslie’s come through for her, Ann’s going to figure something out. What that translates to in real time, though, is walking out and seeing Ron slowly stepping backwards from an advancing Tammy.

Later, she’ll say she wasn’t thinking at all when she hurries up and half-slips, half-forces her arm through Ron’s.

“Hey honey,” she says, pressing into his side and keeping her eyes on his face, “hope you weren’t waiting for me long.”

“I was not waiting long at all,” he says stiffly, his eyes wide and almost panicked as he meets her gaze. “

“What’s the naughty nurse doing here, Ron?” Tammy asks, popping her gum.

“I’m his date,” Ann say, squeezing Ron’s arm as hard as she can to try to forestall his protest. Ron doesn’t say a word, although Ann’s pretty sure she hurt _her_ arm more than she hurt his.

“You?” Tammy asks, and Ann smiles sharply.

“Me.” 

 

  
Ann sticks to Ron’s side for the next hour, dragging him with her when she goes into check on Leslie. (Ron looks grumpy, but he also gives Leslie a hand-carved, painted blue hair clip, half-mumbling _your something blue,_ so he can just shut up as far as Ann’s concerned.)

“Perkins, what on earth put this outrageous plan in your head?” he asks the first time they have a moment to themselves. They’re walking down one of the long hallways, and for all his protestations his arm is firmly trapping hers against his side, as if he’s fully prepared to use her as a human shield.

“You’ve never watched a romcom in your life, have you?” Ann asks.

“I won’t dignify that with a response,” he says, and Ann has to glance away to hide the unwilling twitch of her lips.

 

  
Ron tears up when he walks Leslie down the aisle, but Ann’s been fighting back tears all day, so she barely notices.

Tammy doesn’t ruin the wedding, mostly because Ann’s locked her in the bathroom for the ceremony. 

 

  
“Have you had practice at faking a relationship?” Ron asks. His hand is pressed low on her side, the other warm in her hand.

“Why, you think I’m doing a good job?” she asks. His eyes are teasing, and now that the most crucial bit has passed Ann’s enjoying herself. Besides, Ron didn’t need to ask her to dance.

“I think I hate weddings,” he says, but the warmth of his hand is bleeding through the most gorgeous bridesmaid dress ever made ( _“Ann you are beautiful and you deserve a beautiful dress.”_ ), and she can feel the heat of him against her skin.

“I think,” she says, giddy on wine and the happiness spilling off of Leslie and Ben, “I think you’re lying.” 

 

  
Leslie and Ben stay as evening turns to night; Ann tells her they can take off if they want, that she and the others have everything under control, but Leslie just smiles.

“It’s the happiest day of my life,” she says. “Why would I want to leave when I can share it with all of you?” Ben can’t quite take his eyes off of Leslie, but he’s nodding. Ann’s pretty sure he’d agree to just about anything right now, as long as it made Leslie happy. (She knows the feeling.) “Also,” Leslie says, switching gears momentarily and leveling them both with a stare, “Don’t think for a second that I haven’t noticed you two cozying up, and that I won’t get all of the information about it when I’m back from the honeymoon.”

“Oh!” Ann says, glancing with surprise at Ron. “Oh, no, this was just to distract Tammy.”

“There’s nothing to find out, Leslie,” Ron says with no little consternation. Leslie looks between the two of them thoughtfully.

“They say weddings are a great place to fall in love,” she says, testing the waters. Both Ann and Ron physically try to retreat, and Leslie laughs and turns back to Ben.  The married couple start towards Tom, and Ann and Ron are left staring balefully after them.

“That’s going to be trouble,” Ron says.

“Yep,” Ann agrees. 

 

  
Ron’s hand cups Ann’s cheek, and his lips taste like whiskey. “Don’t tell Leslie,” he murmurs into her mouth, and she curls her fingers into his hair and tugs him through her bedroom door.

 


End file.
